The ADDvantage of a Scattered Mind
A poem by Myrna Perez
I have lost several jobs, relationships and suffered through relentless setbacks;
I daydream too much; can’t follow through, and that is where my determination lacks.
Sometimes I say things that don’t make much sense;
and the feeling of inadequacy makes my negative emotions very intense.
I don’t remember half the things that are said; believe me when I say,
sometimes, I’d rather just stay in bed.
At times, I feel like I’m on a roller coaster ride; but I’ll never admit to it;
because I still have my pride
I have trouble with disorganization and procrastination; I should be resolving the problem.
But instead, I’ll spend hours in contemplation.
I fidget; I’m impatient and people think I’m crazy;
truthfully, it’s so much better than being called “lazy.”
I become easily distracted and lose my train of thought;
inside my head, my challenges are being fought.
I say things that I don’t really mean;
though you must understand, that this is just part of my gene.
My co-workers can’t understand why my desk is always a mess;
they think I’m a slob – and it’s true – I confess
I’m awfully sorry, but I wasn’t aware that I ignored you this morning
whatever you had said; it must have been very boring.
I try to pay attention the best that I can;
but it’s very hard when you only have 30-second attention span.
I know it is frustrating when I’m unable to learn at your speed;
your patience is important for my particular need.
The disadvantage is my poor concentration;
it is very difficult when you have an expanded imagination.
I apologize for not shutting the lights off on time – I should have worked closer with the team;
but instead, I was in the middle of a fascinating dream.
It has come to my attention that I lack in social skills;
in reality, I’m only interested in fast action thrills.
I didn’t retain anything from that long boring meeting – Next time I’ll use a recorder;
but please forgive me, I have Attention Deficit Disorder.
But wait a minute – why should I be ashamed?
I could be a very creative person when my brain is being tamed
Once it is managed; there is no more damage;
therefore, I could use my “disability” to my advantage
I am artistic, inventive, imaginative and innovative,
and I thank GOD for being born creative.
I’ve been told, that I could potentially become a good writer;
knowing this, makes life so much brighter.
My mind is captivated and flooded with imagination;
this helps me immensely designing new and exciting innovations
I must say, that I am no fool;
I could use my “disorder” as a very productive tool.
Never believe that failure is what it solely creates
Look at Walt Disney, Thomas Edison and Bill Gates!
There is no need to strive to become conventional or formal;
and so what if I’m not considered normal.
I remind myself sternly and daily: “Don’t be ashamed that’s an order”!
because now I’ve learned to manage, and embrace my Attention Deficit Disorder.
Copyright © 2006
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Myrna is 41 years-old and from the Los Angeles area. She designs an array of one-of-a-kind jewelry and other arts and crafts, and is currently establishing her own jewelry line.
Myrna wrote this poem soon after being diagnosed at the age of 40, and submitted it to Thrive with ADD to describe her feelings. It’s the first poem she’s written, and we’re honored to be able to print it!
In the Blog
If you have to ask an intimidating person… My last post addressed the common shame-based assumption that many people with ADD / ADHD have: that everyone else knows something they don’t. If you avoid asking questions for fear of looking stupid, apply the strategy “Take It to Court” to quickly prove to yourself that Read post.
Are you sabotaging yourself because you’re ashamed to ask a question? Many people with ADD / ADHD are afflicted with a toxic shame response that is far more self-sabotaging than simply having ADD. If you’re one of them, and you avoid taking a necessary step to follow through, shame is likely the culprit. Sometimes Read post.
In a personal crisis, how much spillover into work is “normal”? At what point does an inability to shut out your problems become an ADD-type focus issue? This question was on the mind of my ADHD coaching client, Daniel, who was in the process of launching a new business. At a critical time in the Read post.